Two whole months

I distinctly remember the first week we were home from the hospital, I sat on my couch, crying of course, and wondered if I would ever survive the first month. Everyone had told us that at six weeks things got easier, if we could just make it til then. Now as we have just celebrated Elijah's two month birthday, I can't believe how fast time has flown.

So much has happened in this one short month. My sweet boy is so alert and responsive. He imitates sounds and smiles so huge it takes up his whole face. He sleeps through the night which is an unbelievable blessing. He self soothes like a champ and has grown very fond of sucking on his fist. He has also had his very first cold. Not fun! He was so sweet and happy through all of it even though he was pretty pitiful. I got some very sweet snuggles those nights.  We have also had to experience two rounds of vaccines. While the moment itself was pretty miserable the following two days were horrific. I know they are necessary and I trust our doctors but he is so unpleasant following those shots. There is little I can do to console him and naps are almost impossible. It's a short two days though and then I'm back to having my happy boy.

Now that bedtime is not a 3 hour ordeal, Jesse and I can actually spend the evening enjoying home-cooked meals, catching up on our TV shows, and relaxing. While some nights still require a 2 am quick feeding, most nights he goes to sleep at 8 and wakes up around 6:30-7 the next morning. God is so good to us to give us a precious baby that is letting us sleep.

I also enjoyed my very first Mother's Day this last month. Last year this day was just another reminder of something I wanted so badly and still didn't have. I am so thankful and grateful that this boy was part of God's plan for us. I treasure every second with him and I am so honored to be his mother. I cannot wait for all of the sweet homemade presents and hand-print cards that are in my future. This Mother's Day my heart and my prayers were with all of the women who have a desire to be a mother. 

Elijah was also able to meet more of his family this month. I am so glad that Jesse's grandmother was able to make it to Raleigh to meet this handsome man. It was a very special moment.

Elijah was also able to meet his enchanting Aunt Carole for a dance recital and birthday weekend palooza. 

 We were able to take a new family picture. It was a very surreal feeling to know that we, with God's grace, added a person to this picture.

I love this picture of all of the cousins. I cannot wait for the day when they can all play together. I didn't grow up near any of my cousins so it is a true blessing that Elijah will have them all near by. Both of my brothers and their wives are such incredible parents so it's an even bigger blessing for Jesse and I to have them to ask a million questions and share in this joy. (Not to mention that Aunt Lisa is a baby whisperer and can get my child to sleep like a pro) 

So what I have learned so far? I have learned that just when you think you have a pattern established, you don't. I have learned to wake up every day and not expect anything. Good nights usually mean good days but good days don't necessarily mean good nights. I have also learned that while books are helpful, they do not know my child. He does not fit in the pages of any book that I have read regardless of how well respected it might be. I am filled to the brim with suggestions and rules but the most important thing I've learned is to watch him. When he looks tired I know that he needs a nap. When he's slept for too long during the day I wake him up. If he wants to sleep in the swing, that's where he sleeps. If he wants to sleep on my chest, who am I to argue. It won't always be that way but for now it works for both of us. I have learned that maternal instincts are God's gift and I have to trust them. The doctors switched us through 5 different formulas until Jesse and I decided to stop and go back to one we had already tried. We switched bottles instead (Thanks Emily) and the battle that was feeding time stopped. I have learned that babies change every single day and it is a gift to be able to be home to watch it happen. I have also learned that while I love him in a way that I never knew possible, there is a very special love that happens between father and son. There are times when he will be screaming at me and Jesse only has to walk in the room to bring out a smile.

Every second is special and I can't wait to see what the next month will bring us.